


Neverending Winter Nights

by ladyamesindy



Series: Le Renard Blanc [1]
Category: Dragon Age, Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Smut With Some Plot, and SMUT, rated E because of reference to past rape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-20
Updated: 2019-09-20
Packaged: 2020-10-24 19:49:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20711567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyamesindy/pseuds/ladyamesindy
Summary: As hot and humid as the summers could be in Ferelden, the winters were just as frigidly cold and vicious.  Caught in Amaranthine in a dangerous winter blizzard, a seasoned traveler and a Grey Warden's paths cross ...





	Neverending Winter Nights

“I’m sorry, there are no more rooms available. The storms, you see. Because of them, we are full.”

Sighing softly, she acknowledged his announcement with a nod. The tavernkeeper’s words came as no real surprise. After all, it was those same storms that drove her into his establishment in the first place. “Might I find a corner by the fire to sleep?”

Relief at her question suggested he expected anything but understanding. “Of course. There will be others here for that very reason. It will be crowded, but I’m sure we can find space for one more.” 

Venturing into the cities and towns across the country always involved risk, but this was the first time she encountered such a situation. Moving their discussion along, she asked, “Might it be possible to have food and drink in the meantime?”

His face blossomed into a full-blown smile as he nodded. He disappeared into the kitchen, giving her the opportunity to find a place to sit and eat her meal. The tavernkeeper hadn’t joked about the crowds – a quick search assured her all tables had been taken as well. With a sigh, she started across the room.

She had chosen this place to stay when it became clear the weather would not relent. Years before, the tavernkeeper had asked for her aid during difficult times. Helping him hadn’t been a question, for reasons he never understood, and ever since, whenever travel brought her this direction she always chose to stay here. It was small, well-kept and there was a certain rustic charm to it. As someone used to being on the road all her life, those characteristics spoke well to her. Though neither ever spoke of that first incident, he treated her well on each visit, offering what he could in eternal thanks.

Tonight, however, proved different. 

As hot and humid as the summers could be in Ferelden, the winters were just as frigidly cold and vicious. Though the worst was usually restricted to the southern climes, particularly around the Korcari Wilds, the rest of the country occasionally suffered as well. Whether in the Frostback Mountains, the Hinterlands, or along the Coastlands, she had experienced it all throughout a lifetime of travel. Some years she fared better than others, but there were plenty of times the reverse also proved true. 

This year was no exception. With the Blight over and the country well on its way to recovery, Mother Nature sought to remind the good folk that there were always dangers to be had. For over three months now, some of the worst storms in history had plagued the country, plagued all of Thedas even, many of which blew in off the Waking Sea with howling, sharp winds and icy pellets as dangerous as any arrow.

Her hood lowered; she scanned the room once more. Though no tables were currently free, luck was still with her. Across the room near the roaring fire, she spotted a man who, while not known to her specifically, his armor was. Alone at a table clearly meant for two, his attention was currently focused away from her. As she approached, it became clear why the other chair remained unoccupied; if his surly expression was any indication, he was not in a good mood.

_I have survived through worse during my life._

She came to a halt beside the table. Offering an openly friendly smile when he glanced up at her, she asked, “Greetings, Grey Warden. Is this seat taken?”

~ n ~

Irritation bloomed in his chest, spreading throughout his body as rapidly as any poison he had previously encountered. Steel blue eyes were frozen to the windows; his scowl dark and threatening with each vibration from the wood and glass as it rattled. He, like the others collected in this room, were stranded by the storm. Had he finished his errand on time, he might have left before it was too late. But no, he’d become distracted, losing track of time and noticing only as he prepared to leave town that the storm would overtake him and make travel too dangerous. 

_Better now than being caught in open countryside,_ a quiet voice reminded him. 

His scowl darkened. Logic, common sense, did not help in this situation save to irritate him further. _I should have left hours ago,_ he silently countered. _I would have beaten the storm back to the keep._

But he hadn’t, and the dangers of leaving as the storm’s first winds started to arrive were warning enough of what was to come. The return trip to Vigil’s Keep was barely a day’s journey, but any fool caught on the roads in weather like this would easily be thrown off course. Better to stay and not risk it. He’d half considered returning to his sister’s house to snag a bit of floor to ride it out, but she and her son were still recovering from losses sustained during the recent darkspawn attack, and he didn’t want to add to their burden. 

_I should have left_, he mused sullenly. _I could be at home, in a familiar bed, surrounded by friends and drinking in good company. Instead, I am stuck in Amaranthine … _He stared down at his tankard for a long moment before draining half of it in one gulp. With his attention finally pulled from observing the storm outside the windows, he chose to survey the crowd, keen eyes moved from person to person, searching, evaluating, identifying any and all potential threats. The noise in the room was dull by comparison to the usual raucous atmosphere back at the Keep, for the moment an annoying buzz only. Still, it hummed at him just beneath the surface and he found himself more annoyed by it than usual. Lifting his tankard again, he mused, _I should just head to my room._

The tankard to the table with a loud thud, his decision mostly made. Fortune had been on his side upon his arrival. The Grey Wardens always had a room on reserve for the times they were in town and needed one. Silence was better than being stuck in a room filled with drunken snores any day of the week, and particularly in his current mood. Bracing his hands against the table, he pushed his chair back, ready to stand …

… until he noticed a slight female figure standing beside him. Glancing up, he met a pair of curious jade green eyes framed by a light spray of freckles across peaches-and-cream-colored cheeks and nose. A mane of auburn curls was pulled away from her face and twisted into a long, thick braid that curved around to hang over her left shoulder. The leather armor she wore was well cared for but had obviously seen a lot of use. And resting over her shoulders, a dark forest green woolen travel cloak lined in heavier fur beneath. She was armed – a traveler then, not one of the town folk – with a pair of daggers at either hip, and peeking above the top of her shoulder he spotted the familiar shape of a longbow. Graceful and long but weatherworn fingers sported the type of glove favored by archers the world over.

All of this he noticed in an instant, but as his eyes returned to her face, he realized the most interesting feature, as she smiled in greeting, was the tattoo on her right cheek; an abstract image of what looked to be a fox that ran from her lower jaw upward to her eyebrow. His attention caught and briefly intrigued by the design, he couldn’t stop himself from staring in fascination at how it seemed to incorporate the angles and planes of her cheeks in its shape. 

And then she spoke.

Blinking, his eyes returned to hers. His first impression was that her accent wasn’t Ferelden. Then again, it wasn’t exactly Orlesian, either. Though similar to both, there was an added element he couldn’t quite pinpoint. Even after a moment’s consideration, he was unable to identify it. For lack of anything better to do with his time, curiosity got the better of him, and he relaxed back into his seat; all thoughts of leaving now gone, and gestured at the open chair, inviting her to sit. “It is now,” he replied. “You look as if you just blew in with the storm.”

Her lips curved upward at the suggestion, a matching brightness in her eyes as she occupied the requested space. “I did,” she agreed, her warm voice relaxed but with a hint of humor in it. “Quite literally, in fact. Had I remained outside any longer, I have no doubt the drifts would overtake me.”

Her quick wit backed up his previous assessment and he chuckled. The last vestiges of his earlier desire to leave faded rapidly as his full attention centered on her.

She set her things aside, leaning her bow against the wall, and the archer in him took notice of the weapon. The wood was of fine quality and stained darker than its natural color, but it was the craftsmanship that caught his attention. Dark and smooth, it looked born to live in the shape rather than fight against it. Nodding at it, he commented, “You have a lovely weapon there.”

Her eyes darted over to gaze fondly at the weapon for a moment before returning to him. “_Merci_,” she murmured. “It once belonged to my mother, and upon her death became mine.”

Brow arching, he asked, “Your weapon of choice, then?”

She nodded, her head bobbing once. “I have in its use since I was young,” she admitted. “I travel much, and it is a faithful, steadfast friend.”

He squinted at it again. “What is it made of? I would almost say Ironbark, but …?”

She chuckled softly and smiled. “A good guess,” she agreed with the hint of teasing, “but looks can be deceiving. It is made from heartwood, but stained dark to blend in better with the natural surroundings.” Sighing softly, she reached over and ran a hand over it in gentle fondness. “A gift,” she added, the slightest hint of pain flickering through her eyes, “from another, more dangerous time.”

He considered what little she’d told him to this point and was able to make an educated guess just as the innkeeper arrived, his hands filled with a trencher for her and two full tankards.

He lifted his tankard to hers, offering her the merest hint of a smile as she murmured something he didn’t quite catch, but it became clear a moment later that she was hesitant to eat in front of him. Setting his ale on the table, he smiled reassuringly. “Please, do not wait on my account. I’ve already had my meal.” He hadn’t, but that was of little consequence. From the moment of his Joining, he had taken to heart the Commander’s words of caution and carried food in his pack that would not perish quickly. 

She tucked into her meal a moment later, clearly relishing it. “I should apologize,” he told her as she ate. “I haven’t introduced myself. I am Nathaniel.”

She swallowed the mouthful of food, taking a quick drink to wash it down. “Kaytaryn,” she replied. “But my friends call me Kayt.”

Her eyes met his as she spoke, a silent question in them. _Or, maybe it’s a challenge,_ he thought, his lips curving a little, not quite a smile but not the usual dour look he normally presented to those around him. Memories of a time long ago, of years spent at his lord’s court, of the normal flirtations with pretty women, returned with a blink of his eyes. Bowing his head just slightly in a gracious manner, he replied, “I am honored you think of me as such already.”

A light shade of pink accented her cheeks, just enough to let him know she was pleased by his reply. 

They talked while she ate, enjoying the company. When she explained she had been far to the west for the past six months, he told her of the happenings in Amaranthine. She returned the favor by telling him what news she could from Orzammar and other places important to the Wardens but were not in close contact. The Warden Commander would appreciate the updates, of that he was certain.

Long after the food was gone and both had several tankards in their bodies to chase away the chill, Nathaniel took a moment to look around the room once more. Still crowded, it became obvious several intended to start settling in for the evening. Leaning across the table, he asked, “Do you have a room?”

Kayt shook her head. “Matthias told me they were full when I arrived.”

Rising to his feet, Nathaniel offered her his hand. “If you like, we can continue our discussion without interruption,” he explained. Then more relaxed, “There is a bed, of course.” Her brow lifted as he hurried to add, “I am not suggesting we share it, but that you may use it tonight.” This wouldn’t be the first time he slept on the floor.

Eyes now suddenly hooded, she looked up at him and remained still. “And what of you?” 

A smile finally curved at his lips. “I have slept on ground much harder than the floor up there,” he replied by way of reassurance.

Pushing herself to her feet, she asked, “Are all Grey Wardens so chivalrous?”

A soft snort escaped before Nathaniel could stop himself, his thoughts immediately lighting on some of his fellow Wardens. “I can speak only for myself, not the others,” he replied honestly.

The answer appeared to set her mind at ease. Slipping her hand into his, she stood and collected her things before they crossed the room together in silence.

~ n ~

Kayt entered the room before him, guided by his hand at her back. Throughout her years, she had learned to read people well, she thought, and that was what guided her now. Downstairs, sensed no malice or anything untoward from Nathaniel. The fact that he was a Grey Warden meant little, really. Everybody was different, it didn’t matter who they were. Some people had good intentions; others bad. That was a fact of life, and one which she knew well enough from personal experience. It was, in part, why she was who she was.

Setting her belongings aside on a nearby table, she looked around the room. It wasn’t large by any stretch of the imagination, but to her left was a bed big enough for two people. Straight ahead, a small hearth contained a blazing fire for warmth. Before it was an open space where one could easily lie on the floor to sleep. And, on the wall to the left of the bed, a window rattled as the winds howled through the Amaranthine night. Nathaniel followed her inside, and when the door closed, Kayt spotted a small recessed area containing room for a bathtub.

Once the door was closed, Nathaniel moved over to check on the fire before turning back to face her. Gesturing toward the bed, he said, “I’m afraid this is the only place to sit.”

Kayt chuckled softly and removed her cloak. She set her daggers aside along with her pack and bow while grinning knowingly over at him. “I had thought I understood your motivations downstairs,” she murmured with a soft laugh. “Perhaps I should ask just how you define ‘talking?’”

A wry smile pulled at his lips, but a sparkle of mischief gleamed back at her as she climbed onto the bed. Deep inside, she suspected he had the heart of a tease, but it was being blocked by something else she couldn’t quite identify. It wasn’t fear or anger, and it certainly wasn’t reluctance; his hands proved that the moment he reached out to offer assistance, his thumbs gently, sensually caressing the back of her hand. And when he spoke, his voice dropped an octave, but remained as smooth as silk as it had been before. “How many languages do you know?”

Kayt settled herself on the bed, half turning to face him. They sat side by side, a normal position if they were to share the bed to sleep, and she eased slightly toward him until their heads were mere inches apart. Inhaling deeply, she caught the fresh, woodsy scent of the outdoors mixed with smoke and stale ale, but beneath it all her nose tickled at the natural, spicy scent hint of _him_. “Ferelden, Orlesian and Dalish,” she replied, her lids half closing. “I suppose you might also say I speak ‘animal,’ as well.”

He shifted on the bed, turning toward her. When her eyes opened, she found surprise in his. “A ranger?”

“Mmm, yes.”

“Then you and I have more in common than I first thought.” 

As unexpected as his announcement was, it was no less pleasing a thought. Many people claimed affinity with nature and animals, but only a few actually understood them. She wondered if it had somehow been part of why she was drawn to him down in the common room.

One of his hands moved so that his fingertips could trace the fox tattoo on her cheek. Kayt shivered slightly, but did not move away. “Tell me about this.”

Drawing a slow, calming breath in through her nose, she replied, “My first successful ‘talk.’” His eyes jumped from her cheek to her eyes, and in them Kayt noticed curiosity … and something more. Her heart jumped, recognition dawning, and for a moment her breath caught. Had she misread his intentions? 

Though close enough his breath fanned lightly over her cheek and tattoo, he did not move further. “And his response?”

Kayt’s eyes were glued to his for a long, cautious moment. Part of her longed for what she sensed was his offer. Her life of travel was a lonely, but necessary, calling, particularly these days. And while she met many people, both good and bad and in between, she never had reacted so quickly to someone like this. Using her tongue to moisten her lips, she saw his eyes move fractionally, following the movement, before returning to her eyes. Something flared behind that steel bluish-grey, something that stoked a fire deep within her belly. 

“Encouraging,” she managed.

His fingertips moved to trace lightly over her lips. In the half second that followed, several things happened: Kayt’s lips moved against his touch even as her breath caught again, and Nathaniel moved in closer until his hovered above. “Shall I encourage you as well?” he asked, his voice a low, rumbling half-growl.

Lifting a hand to his shoulder, his voice filtered through her body. She was keenly aware of him as sensations she’d long thought dead and gone flared to life to prove her wrong. His other arm slid around her waist, caressing her hip through her clothing and urging her closer and closer until their bodies touched from head to toe. And yet, his lips did not touch hers; his eyes remaining focused on hers, as if seeking permission.

Kayt groaned as their torsos touched, desperation quick to ignite and course through her entire body. Though fully dressed in her armor, and he in his, she could _feel _him against her. 

~ n ~

Though not his original intention, Nathaniel would never admit he hadn’t hoped the night might progress as to this point, nor so quickly. He couldn’t deny there was something between them, perhaps something as strong and potentially violent as one of Dworkin’s explosive devices back at the keep. Kayt, for all her caution, was deliciously sensual in her responses. Combined with her willingness, that promised much more than he could ever have hoped. 

“Yes …”

The distance between their lips was minute. Lowering to capture her lips with his, he smiled against her lips when she leaned upward into the touch. From one heartbeat to the next, their lips bounced against each other once, then twice. Darting his tongue out to tease hers, he was delighted when she mimicked the movement. Dragon-fire heat consumed him in that moment; this was no ordinary kiss! And the soft purrs and whimpers escaping her throat drove him wild. Greedily, he tucked away the memories to sustain him years from now once they were long parted. 

Hands, desperate to touch, to _feel_, fumbled with armor and clasps that hindered. Momentarily pulling his lips from hers, he searched her eyes, fingers gently gliding and caressing along the sensitive skin of the side of her neck, eventually lowering to the straps that held her armor in place. Again, he silently asked a question with his eyes. The time that it took for her to give him a quick nod in response seemed to last an eternity. He responded by kissing her again in a kiss no less heated than before. 

Familiar with leather armor, he knew the locations of buckles and belts. She leaned to one side, allowing his deft fingers to unfasten them without further challenge. The only difficult part came as he continuously bumped into smaller, more graceful hands than his as they pushed and pulled at his clothing in return. Gentle yet delightfully wicked, her fingers scraped and scrabbled across the bare skin she found beneath his clothing, leaving him to suck in a sharp breath. Desperate to catch a breath, he carefully pushed away from her and once more broke their kiss.

They were of an age, he’d discovered that downstairs, and he was not worried she was too young. However, certain other comments she’d made suggested a necessity for taking things slowly between them. She was not as experienced as he, that much he was able to guess, and it was not something he would disregard. 

He rose and took a step back from the bed before reaching out to help her to her feet. When she followed, he stood before her, removing each piece of her armor until only the lightweight tunic and leggings worn beneath remained. But he also noticed as he focused on the armor that her hands were not idle. They moved to her braid, easily and quickly loosening the tie. He half-considered asking her to stop when they started to unweave the braid, for he liked how it looked on her, but he noticed she removed a few small metallic items from it, items that stopped him cold as realization dawned. 

_Caltrops!_

“Maker’s breath!” he rasped, attempting to recover his breath even as his eyes widened in surprise. It didn’t take much to understand they both could have been injured had they not been removed. “Why?”

Slender shoulders shrugged as she finished loosening the rest of her hair. It fell into a long, heavy, thick curtain around her shoulders only ending at her waist. “In my line of work,” she explained, her voice nonchalant, “I do what I need to in order to survive.”

That brought an unexpected chill into the heat of the room. Lifting his hand to her face, he used his thumb to gently caress her cheek. “What is it you do?”

“I travel,” she replied simply. “I always have.”

He eyed the small devices still in her hand before taking them. He set them aside with the rest of her things before returning to her. “Alone?”

He saw no concern in her eyes, just simple acceptance. “Mostly, yes.”

He chewed on his lower lip for a moment. “You have been attacked, then?”

A nod. “Yes.”

“By animals?”

Beneath his hands, he felt a tremor move through her, but she only shrugged. “Men, animals; they are all the same, are they not?”

He leaned over and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, realizing now had circumstances been different, they might never have met. “I am grateful you remembered them,” he murmured.

Kayt chuckled softly. “There is a difference between a man asking for what does not belong to him and a man taking it by force.” There was a hard look of experience behind her green gaze. “You asked.”

Nathaniel would not say he was a man given to flights of fancy, but in that moment, a number of images passed through his mind. Images of her. Of facing bandits and ne’er-do-wells, common enough encounters on the roads across Thedas, he supposed. And yet, there was something in the almost too casual way in which she spoke that hinted at a much more personal experience. 

Frowning, he considered that. She stood before him now without fear, no indication of hesitation or anxiety over their rapidly building closeness. It was a heartening sign to say the least. “Kayt?”

She sighed softly, tilting her head into the touch at her cheek. Her eyes were bright and clear as they met his. From one moment to the next, she recognized his unasked question and, to his astonishment, she nodded. As easy as that, though he suspected it would be a far from easy reply.

As they stood beside the bed, very little of their clothing remaining between them, she spoke quietly. “Many years ago, a lifetime ago, I was young and naïve. I did not read people or their intentions so well back then. Now, I do.” She paused, not breaking eye contact, before adding, “Afterward, I could have lived in fear the rest of my life, or I could move forward, take charge, continue to live.” Leaning up on her toes, she pressed her lips to his. “I chose to live.”

Nathaniel groaned softly, eyes closing against her suggestion. His voice was a raw whisper of concern when he finally responded. “I don’t want to hurt you, Kayt.”

“You will not,” she promised. She pressed another light, teasing kiss to his lips and he shivered. “My fears left me the day I resolved the situation.”

Another shiver, for altogether different reasons, shook his frame this time. “You killed him?”

She shook her head. “I provided justice and made certain he could never do it again.”

Slowly, both of his hands framed her face. Gently, he kissed her. He started with her forehead again, brushed one once over each eye, until finally settling over her lips. Each touch was light, gentle, careful, and respectful. When he pulled back, he rested his forehead against hers. “I ask you now, Kayt, so there is no misunderstanding between us: are you absolutely certain this is what you want?”

She sighed softly, seemingly melting in his touch. “Never have I been so certain of anything before.”

From one heartbeat to the next, he drew in a deep breath and slanted his mouth over hers, devouring her again and granting access to the biting flames of desire that never fully left before. Kayt groaned in appreciation, her hands sliding up and around his shoulders and neck, tightening and holding him there when he might pull back. 

~ n ~

She hadn’t expected to give him her life story, but the fact he caught on so easily, that he even cared enough to ask, required some of it be told. At the very least, she needed to assure him following down this path was indeed what she wanted. Back then she’d been young, naïve; a victim to circumstance and bad decisions more than anything else, but this time she walked in with eyes wide open and welcoming.

She lowered her hands, snaking them beneath the edge of his tunic again so she could rub calloused fingers and palms across the muscles and planes of his stomach and chest. What she hoped would be pleasurable for him turned out to be a delight she hadn’t quite expected for herself as well. He growled in response, soft, little sounds in the back of his throat, encouraging her to continue her explorations which she did until her hands became too tangled in the fabric. At that point, he broke their kiss and took a step away to yank the tunic over his head. For a full minute, Kayt stood there staring at him. She knew he was a fighter of some kind – his fluid grace of motion gave that away – and he’d mentioned he was an archer, so she expected the slighter build and muscular arm strength. His skin had clearly spent many days kissed by the sun, a sharp if shocking contrast to her creamy complexion. The light spray of hair across his chest was as dark as that which framed his face, all the way down to the V that met the waistband of leather pants snugging his hips. Unable to stop herself, Kayt reached a hand out, beckoning him to return and attempting not to stare or drool.

He covered the distance like a powerfully built cat. Kayt drew in a long, deep breath when his arms moved around her, but where she thought he would pull her up against him, his hands instead dropped to the hem of her tunic. He leaned in toward her, turning his head slightly so he could growl in her ear, “Lift your arms.”

She did as requested, shrugging out of the tunic as he pulled it free of her hair. He tossed it across the room in the general direction of her other things, but she was lost to the sound as he ran his lips along her shoulder, kissing a path up the side of her neck. The move was unexpected and deliciously delightful, leaving her nearly breathless in response. Her hands moved out of instinct; pressing his head closer while she struggled to find air to keep breathing.

Calloused fingers toyed at the ties to her breast band, but the fabric was no challenge for him, and as the fabric drifted away, the cooler air of the room caused her skin to pebble. Kayt shivered at the sensation. 

He chuckled softly against her skin, his breath fanning across the skin and warming it as he moved lower. “Like that, do you?”

She groaned softly, the purring of his voice sending more chills through her, but of a different sort. Her hands slid into his hair like combs even as she tried to arch her head so she could kiss him. He glanced up at her briefly, a sinfully wicked gleam flaring brightly in his eyes, just before he closed his lips around one of her nipples. 

Unprepared for the onslaught, Kayt’s breath caught. Beginning deep in her belly, waves of riotous sensations surged outward. A soft squeal slipped past her lips and she tightened her hands out of instinct. “Na-Nathaniel!” Each and every swirl of his tongue across her skin left her staggered. At one point, he gently scraped his teeth across the point, before wrapping them with his lips to protect her from actual harm. Kayt’s knees gave way in that moment as the pressure tripled, a cry bursting free from her though it took no specific shape or form. 

The world shifted around her as she started to fall, but any fear was quickly chased away. Moving quickly, Nathaniel rose, scooping her into his arms to set her on the bed. Once there, he returned his attentions, moving to the other. His dark hair hung loosely around his face, tickling her flesh, but Kayt barely noticed. One of his hands moved in to take over the side he’d left, but the other slid around her hips to her backside and squeezed. This time when he took her nipple between his teeth, he added gentle, careful pressure…

~ n ~

Nathaniel crawled up onto the bed beside her, carefully sliding a knee between her legs. He was rewarded as she squirmed against him, pressing her lower body tightly against him in the process. A moment later he was pleasantly delighted as her hips started to move. She was a sensual creature, that much was certain, and for the first time since her admission, he fully believed she would be fine. Despite that, he kept a watchful eye upon her reactions. Lowering his other hand to her hip, now fully framing both and guiding her movement, Nathaniel continued to play with the nipple between his lips as breathy gasps and cries escaped her lips. 

Her response was driving him wild as well. Releasing his hold on her with a loud ‘pop’ping sound, he followed a path up her body once more, all the while nuzzling along the sensitive skin of her chest, shoulders and neck. She shivered uncontrollably; her breath now short bursts accompanied by the loveliest little whimpers. Capturing her mouth again, he renewed their sensual battle there, tempting and teasing her with his tongue until she responded with equal fervor.

When her hips slowed, he shifted his hands to loosen the ties at her waist. “Lift your hips for me,” he requested, breaking the kiss. Slowly, he peeled away her leggings, gently easing them over her hips and down well-muscled legs. She said she traveled for a living and Nathaniel could believe it. Before he could remove her clothing, however, he had to remove her boots. Against the darker fabric of the bedding, each area of new skin that appeared shone brightly in the firelight. As he’d observed earlier, she was fair-skinned, and he discovered to his delight, that the occasional dusting of freckles extended across her body. Her hair now spread out beneath her, he removed the leggings, her socks, and then reached for her small clothes, leaving her completely bare before him.

His first thought upon meeting her in the common room was that she was small, petite. When they’d stood to come up to his room, the top of her head barely reached his shoulder. But now lying unclothed before him, he realized that looks could truly be deceiving. Physically, she was as well built as any rogue, her muscles deceptively hiding a strength he suspected might match his own. She was no fighter, though; that much she’d admitted.

Propping himself on one arm, Nathaniel lay out next to her while using his free hand to continue touching. Light caresses over and around her shoulder. A slightly harder but still gentle tweak of her nipple. He utilized the strength of fingers used to drawing a bowstring and arrow in battle to continue tempting and teasing her.

“Nathaniel!” Her hoarse cry lilted upwards in a half-plea as his fingers continued sensitizing susceptible areas. 

Leaning in near her ear, he nuzzled his nose against the side of her neck. “Hmm?” 

She drew in a harsh breath, and he noticed she held her lower lip between her teeth, biting it tightly as if to fight against the sensation. Nathaniel moved quickly, his hand darting low until the tip of his fingers settled between her legs. Her body clearly ready, he slid one finger inside. 

Kayt’s eyes shot open wide, a soft ‘Oh!’ forming at her lips, but no sound came out. Slowly, Nathaniel withdrew, nearly leaving her entirely. A flash of something in her eyes – Startlement? Disappointment? – led him to return just as gently, but speed and more pressure. 

“Ahhh!”

Delight filled him and he chuckled near her ear. “That’s it, Kayt,” he growled. “That’s what I want to hear.” He repeated the movement, slowly, insistently, until her struggle to breathe sharpened and her cry indicated she neared the precipice. “Come for me!” 

Her head rolled to the side and he adjusted his position so he could see her clearly. Confusion welled in her eyes, and for a moment concern filled him. This was new to her, that much was clear, but he so wanted it to be a surprise for her. He withdrew again, but like before she pleaded with him with her eyes and he returned just as quickly. “I want to hear you!” he repeated. 

Barely had he said the words when her body started to convulse around his finger, a long wail escaping her lips. Her response was more than he expected, to the point that her voice shook along with the rest of her body. Diving in, his lips dropped to hers, fiercely claiming them. “That’s it,” he encouraged between kisses. “More of that!”

~ n ~

When next she opened her eyes, the first word that came to Kayt’s mind was _shattered_. Fine little tremors still rippled through her limbs and across her belly, and it took extreme effort to find strength to open her eyes. When finally able, she blinked twice before her vision came into focus, staring up at him. He lay beside her, still dressed, the bright gleam of desire lighting his blue gaze. Inhaling slowly through her nose, she was content with what just happened …

.. until his finger nudged gently at her tender flesh once more. She gasped, her eyes widening up at him as yet another wave of tremors began. “Nathaniel!”

He chuckled, that lovely deep laugh that was half purr, half growl. “You still want more, I see.”

He eased his finger from her body and she was amazed at the disappointment it left behind. She groaned softly, realizing belatedly that he moved away from her to stand beside the bed. She watched, unable to voice a protest at the separation, as in quick, sure movements, he removed his clothing, stripping down until he was as bare as she. Her breath caught, body still twitching thanks to his earlier attentions, even as her eyes took him in. 

_Beautiful …_ It was easy to recognize where the catlike grace he’d displayed earlier came from. Tensile strength stored in the slight framework of one used to quick, sure movement. Swallowing past a growing tightness, she ventured lower, appreciating the flat belly and trim hips. The firelight flickered around him, lighting and darkening the planes of his frame, and desire roared through her blood.

Until her gaze was finally drawn just below his waist. From one moment to the next, the soft groan of appreciation rumbling from her lips shifted to a soft whimper, fear setting in with memories from long ago, and it shook her to her core.

He must have noticed. He moved slowly, cautiously, when he returned, lying back onto the bed beside her. He took time to settle himself, almost as if he expected her to protest, and she nearly did. It took a force of will to pull her gaze back to his face, to search his features to find reassurance.

Leaning slightly toward her, he lifted his free hand to gently caress down her shoulder and arm until he took her hand in his. Squeezing gently, he whispered calmly near her ear, “Talk to me.”

A shiver ran through her along with his voice. “I –.” She drew in a calming breath, releasing it as slowly a moment later. “It’s silly,” she murmured in reply.

His shook his head immediately. “None of this is silly. If you have concerns, I have them as well.”

Contemplating this, she closed her eyes. His hand released its hold on her, but did not move far. When it settled gently on the light swell of her hip, she felt it. Though the past haunted her at present, her body responded to his touch. Nothing he’d done so far this evening had actually frightened her, she realized. Only the sight of him, the sight of his body reacting to her, had. “I - I want this,” she breathed, opening her eyes once more so she could see his face for his reaction. “I do.” There was an insistence to her tone. “But, when you removed your clothes, for just a moment I was reminded of …”

His eyes met and held hers. “Of him?”

She nodded slowly.

He leaned toward her, his lips finding her is a surprisingly gentle meeting of lips considering some of what they’d already shared this evening. “What can I do to ease your mind?”

Quick tears welled, slipping one at a time from the lower corners of her eyes and dribbling down into the hair at her temples. One hand rose to frame his cheek. “I don’t know that there is anything you can do, but I thank you for your concern.” She sighed softly, a small sniffle escaping.

Silence filled the room for a few moments save for the crack and pop of the fire, but though a bit awkward, it wasn’t overly uncomfortable. “I risk sounding insensitive with what I am about to ask,” he said after a time, “but consider this: were you lying on your back when he took you? Is it the position you fear?”

Startled by the question, Kayt blinked but considered it fully. “I … no, I wasn’t. It … He …” Heat rose to her cheeks, but he didn’t tease or attempt to shame her in any obvious way, so she forced herself to continue. “It … It’s complicated. We fought before we …” Swallowing, she pushed herself upright, drawing her knees close to her chest and wrapping her arms around them. She stared into the fire for a long minute. Nathaniel followed her a moment later, draping one arm gently across her shoulders in silent support. Patiently, he sat there in silence, giving her the time she needed.

“He took me by surprise,” she whispered, eyes glued to the fire. “And when I realized his true intentions, … well, I fought back.”

“As you should have,” he replied gently. His arm tightened across her back but only briefly. “No man should take a woman in such a manner.”

She heard him and inside, a part of her simply wanted to turn and hug him, to thank him for his understanding. Instead, she remained still, focused, but she started to explain.

“I was seventeen. We were in a village we often visited and a friend had talked me into joining her and some others as we celebrated Summerday. Somehow during that evening, he managed to separate me from the rest ….” 

For the briefest of moments, her world shifted. Instead of a tavern room in Amaranthine in the middle of a blizzard, she was in the Bannorn, still night, the heat of the early summer evening as oppressive as always. 

“He … he cornered me inside an abandoned hut on the fringe the village and secured the door behind him. At first, I did not believe he was serious. He kissed me, which at first I did not mind, but when his hands started grabbing …” She winced and turned her head away from Nathaniel. “He had me half undressed before I could respond. I … I tried to get by him, to remain out of his reach, but he knocked me to the floor …”

~ n ~

Gently, Nathaniel guided her to lean against him, drawing his other arm around so he could hug her. He kept his hold loose, should she decide to pull away, and where just minutes before had been desire, now his only goal was to reassure her he was not this other man. 

“I can picture what happened next,” he whispered.

A shudder rolled through her shoulders as she turned back to face him. In her eyes he found remembered pain. Physical pain, no doubt, and probably a hefty amount of humiliation. He brushed his lips lightly across her forehead. “You said you retaliated later?” Perhaps moving her beyond the incident might help.

For a moment, her face twisted in confusion, but she eventually nodded. “He left me there afterward,” she breathed, “an aching, bleeding mess. I found my things, escaped back to the camp I shared with my guardian. I cleaned up as best I could but I did not return. When my guardian found me later, I swore him to secrecy before I told him.” She gave Nathaniel a knowing look. “Andaer would have hunted him down and killed him then and there.”

Nathaniel nodded solemnly. “As would I, had I been there, if only to give you peace of mind.”

The first hints of a smile curved at her lips as she rested her head against his shoulder. “Neither of you would have been right,” she insisted. “It was years before we returned there again, for obvious reasons. I discovered he was still there, but when I saw him, he did not recognize me. During our visit, I found out from my friend that this man had done something similar to someone else after me. I knew as soon as she told me I had to take action. He could not be left to do the same again.”

Glancing up at him, her hair falling around her shoulders, she said, “I’d finished my training by then and I …” 

Her voice broke off and she started to shake. Gently, Nathaniel tucked her hair back over her shoulder, concerned she was crying … but found her laughing softly. “You told me you were trained as a ranger?”

She nodded.

“You …” His eyes widened as understanding dawned. Smiling, he said, “I see.”

Turning back to him, a mostly complete smile now on her lips, she insisted, “And so far as I know he has never bothered any other girls since.”

_Ingenuity, thy name is woman,_ he thought. “That is as it should be,” he agreed, gently kissing her cheek this time.

Silence returned, this time comfortably, until he rose and crossed the room. He poured a cup of water which he offered her on his return. Setting it aside after she drank her fill, he climbed back onto the bed. He took a few minutes to plump the pillows and adjust them between his back and the headboard.

“I have an idea,” he told her once he was done, “if you still want to proceed?”

Still seated in the middle of the bed, she’d watched him with calm but cautious eyes. Now, she nodded. “I do.”

He patted the mattress on either side of him. “Come over here, then. Sit across my lap with your legs on either side of me.”

She frowned, but followed his instruction. “Will this hurt you?”

“No,” he replied honestly, “but it will give you control.” They now sat face to face, eye to eye, and he saw understanding starting to build along with something else in her eyes. “I will only take as much as you are willing to give,” he murmured.

“Nathaniel, I –.”

Taking one of her hands, he lifted it so he could press a light kiss to her inner wrist. A spark of desire flared up in her eyes, accompanied by the smallest tremor beneath her skin. “Trust me.”

After a moment’s hesitation, she cautiously adjusted her position to something more comfortable. Nathaniel framed her face, urging her to lean in closer and kiss him, an action she seemed reluctant to take at first, but eventually she conceded. The effect was immediate; heat and fire from earlier tickled at the touch of their lips, reigniting the flames. 

“We will do this nice and easy,” he murmured when she pulled back to catch her breath a moment later. “You decide what, when, how much, how long.”

Kayt sighed softly, nodding. Slowly, Nathaniel moved his hands to her breasts. Taking his sweet time, he caressed, squeezed, gently tugged and lightly pinched. He knew the exact moment desire shot straight through her to her belly – her breath caught, her back stiffened, and her beautiful green eyes widened. It was difficult for him to hide his reaction, both physically and emotionally, but to her credit, she did not cringe away. 

Her tongue darted out to wet her lips, their eyes still locked together, even as her hands rose to grasp at his shoulders. At the same time, his started to roam further, shaping, testing, teasing with light touches. Each time she groaned, each tremor that followed, he rejoiced inside, and outwardly nodded his encouragement. Occasionally, he’d whisper soft praise to her as well.

She groaned deeply when one of his hands curved around her hip and backside, grasping firm hold so she wouldn’t topple over. She looked shocked for a moment, and he paused, concern returning. “Everything alright?”

It took her a moment to reply, but she nodded. “I … I didn’t realize I was falling,” she murmured, a slight hint of embarrassment staining her cheeks.

Chuckling softly, he rasped, “Lean into me. I will keep you safe.” She followed his suggestion, and his other hand echoed the first. Her head resting on his shoulder, he relished the soft moans and squeaks escaping her throat at his touch. 

And then she surprised him.

Given her past history, Nathaniel fully expected that the remainder of their night would be focused on his attention to her, but the moment she leaned in toward him, she turned her head on his shoulder so that her lips met the sensitive skin of his shoulder and neck. Unable to stop himself, he groaned, and at the same time, his entire body twitched almost violently from head to toe. He watched her closely, afraid it might frighten her, but instead he found the bright fire of desire behind a secret smile that reached from her lips to her eyes. He lifted one hand to the back of her head, threading it through her hair, and urged her lips close to his. “You, sly fox,” he growled before covering her lips.

Kayt chuckled as he drew back. “I would have thought you had sufficient warning,” she countered as she fought for breath.

_Laughter_, he decided as they both echoed the other in that moment, _makes this so much better …_

Their journey became more of a friendly competition from that point forward. It was obvious she intended to give as well as take, whether she meant it to distract herself or she had truly moved beyond her fears he didn’t know. 

Rasping, heavy breaths mixed and mingled with soft whimpers and deep groans. Sliding his hand around her hip, Nathaniel caught her earlobe gently between his teeth at the same moment his fingers lowered to the nest of curls at her core once more. Carefully, he tested her readiness and he was delighted to feel her body tremble against his. Taking several long moments to tease her entrance, his finger tip darting quickly in and out as he had before in a series of flirtatious assaults, he grinned into her neck when she hissed his name around a whimper. Nipping lightly at the juncture of skin where shoulder met neck, he growled, “Tell me! Tell me what _you_ want!”

~ n ~

Uncertainty left her frozen for a half second as Kayt considered what to do next until she settled her hands at his shoulders and pulled herself up. “You!” she insisted. “I want you!”

His hands returned to her hips; bands of steel and strength that were surprisingly gentle in the moment. Carefully, he guided her lower. As he did so, Kayt used one hand to frame his jaw and turn his eyes to meet her. At the first moment of contact, her eyes widened and she jumped, but she nodded at him to continue. Steel blue eyes darkened with an intensity that sent a shiver straight down her spine.

But he paused a second later; contact barely made between them. Leaning in, he caught her lips in a fierce kiss, before he breathed in a desperate voice, “You do it. You control it.”

His hips twitched against her thighs, and Kayt groaned deeply. Drawing in a shaky breath, she slowly eased down, surrounding him with her heat. She winced once, her body stretching to accept him, and he noticed. He framed her face with his hands and kissed her, long, deep, heated. Kayt suspected it was as much for her as it was for him, for she could feel the tight constraint that vibrated through him. Yes, he allowed her to control this, but it was at a cost to him. 

About halfway joined, Kayt had to stop for a moment, though it was an effort for her. “Ho-how far?” she asked, a hint of pain in her voice.

“However far you wish,” he rasped. An uncontrollable twitch of his hip moved sent him upwards, and his hands immediately fell to her hips, tightening there as he fought against his instinctual reaction. Gritting his teeth, he hissed, “I’m sorry.”

Kayt groaned, unconcerned. In fact, part of her wished he might take over control just then. She appreciated his gentle, cautious actions, and so far, nothing about this reminded her of that first time – no pain, no force, no humiliation. But, she was human, too, and though she wasn’t exactly certain how to proceed, her body was screaming for release. What could she do? 

Taking her lip between her teeth, she bit it, attempting to focus. Breathing in and out through her nose, holding onto his shoulders, she wiggled slightly then dropped herself the rest of the way in one, quick move.

“Kayt!”

Fullness, unlike anything she’d ever felt before, left her stretching. Any discomfort she felt quickly diminished, however, as evidenced when she started shivering, her body overloading with intense sensation. In the background, she heard him panting, the harsh sound nearly as endearing to her as the care he’d been showing her this last while. 

Cautiously, Kayt wiggled her hips a bit, attempting to find a more tolerable position. Nathaniel groaned, his hands tightening at her hips. “Stop!” he pleaded.

Kayt met his gaze. “Are you … alright?”

An almost agonized groan escaped his lips. “I need you to … just …” He grimaced and grunted softly. “Just a moment …”

Her own chest heaved almost violently, desperate for air, and she admitted, “I want to feel you move.”

Her world turned upside down then as he eased her backwards until she lay flat. Moving quickly, he followed, positioning her legs around him and pressing his hips as close as he could. Kayt gasped in surprise. Pure sensation flooded her body, muscles from arms to legs to her inner core now twitching without her control. She saw him grimace again, but though he looked to be in pain, he did not pull back. Shifting herself careful, Kayt drew her legs up close to her chest and reached to hold them out of is way. Nathaniel drew back, returning almost instantly. And in that moment, as he filled her completely, a rough, ragged, loud groan was torn from her lips.

~ n ~

She was almost too much for him, he decided as he fought back the primal urge to take her completely in that moment. But he couldn’t, not yet. He needed her to find her release first.

He cradled her face again, kissing her heatedly even as he cautiously started to move his hips. In her eyes, he saw no fear. 

“M-more!” she begged.

Her voice shook, but her eyes held conviction. No longer able to maintain control of his actions, Nathaniel flexed his hips once more, nudging as close to her as he could until she moaned in appreciation. The delightful sounds escaping her throat thrilled him in a way he couldn’t explain. Never before had he experienced such intense sensations while making love to a woman. But in them, he also found what he needed – assurance that he was causing pleasure and not pain. 

Flexing his hips again, he retreated briefly, thrusting back with force and intent. Again, she groaned. “More!”

Bracing his arms to either side of her shoulders, he stared down at her lovely face, watching each expression that crossed it as he moved. He groaned himself when her hands, seeking something to occupy them, started fluttering across his chest, through his hair, grasping tightly at his hips. She couldn’t seem to find a place to settle, but all the while her breathing increased and the little noises she made were simply music to his ears. 

He knew she was near; she tightened around him to near impossible levels and the familiar look of shock mixed with a completely different sort of fear filled her eyes.

“N-Nathaniel!”

He took one of her hands, brought it to his lips so he could kiss the back of it. He squeezed it tight before holding it to his chest. All the while, he did not stop moving. “I … I’m here!” he promised. “Let it happen …”

She fell over the edge after several more moments, her head arching backward, chest rising, and hand tightening beneath his. A surprisingly soft, if long, cry slipped from her. He slowed his thrusts, but continued the motion, and noticed in the process that her breasts still jostled back and forth almost violently. She convulsed, from head to toe, her tightness wrapping around him so sweetly it was all he could do to let her ride out the storm first…. 

~ n ~

Her eyes opened to near darkness this time, the sounds of heavy breathing still echoing around her. It took a long moment to realize she was as much at fault as he was.

“You are amazing.”

His words startled her, but Kayt managed a soft laugh. Rolling onto her side, she faced him. “I think you are describing yourself,” she replied easily. She ran her fingers over his face, tracing along his jaw. “I – Thank you,” she whispered as her fingers stopped on his lips. His brow arched, and she added, “For being patient with me, for helping me find my way.”

He took her hand in his and squeezed before moving to lean over and placed a kiss on the tip of her nose. “You deserve it,” he assured her. He found her hair again, and used his hand to comb it back out of her face. With a bit more mischievousness in his eyes, he added, “You are worth it.”

She swallowed past a sudden lump in her throat. She wasn’t so naïve this time around to think this was anything more than one night between two people caught up in a storm, but she wondered if they might not someday find one another again. “And on the ‘morrow?”

“Tomorrow will take care of itself,” he suggested. Reaching out, he folded her into his arms and brought the bedding up and over them. “In the meantime, we still have the rest of tonight.”

Startled, Kayt tilted her head to look up at him. “Really? I thought …?”

He smiled, chuckling softly as her voice faded. “If I were a normal man, perhaps,” he replied. “But I am no normal man. I am a Grey Warden.”

“I thought as much,” she replied, noting the accuracy of her earlier assessment, “but I don’t see how –?”

“The rumors about our stamina?”

Realization dawned in that moment, and Kayt pushed herself up so she could rest across his chest and see his face. With a smile brightening her eyes and curving her full lips, she asked, “All true?”

His returning smile was only slightly sheepish, but the intensity of his gaze belied any embarrassment he might feel. “Yes.” He trailed his fingertips lightly across her back and shoulders, down one arm until he could easily cup one of her breasts. Lightly and accompanied by a flare of returning desire, he used his thumb to trace around her nipple. A soft gasp was her only reaction. “If you think _you_ will be up for it,” he amended.

Kayt laughed softly. She recognized a challenge when one was offered, and this certainly fit the bill. Arching her back, her gaze dropped to watch as he continued to tease her breast. “That …” Her voice cracked as a groan fought for breath. “That should not be a problem,” she finally rasped out.

Rolling quickly, he carried her over until she lay beneath him. She noted the wicked gleam in his eyes continuing to grow, and how it appeared to correspond to a growing tightness deep in her belly. Lowering his lips to hover just above, he replied, “Good. I would hate to disappoint you ….”

**Author's Note:**

> This was something that came to me last November during Nano. It got set aside afterward to await editing which I only just got around to. It's an idea that formed many years ago, almost ten now, that finally found its way to paper. I'm going to tag it as a part of a series, because there are ideas for future posts, but I have no timeline for when they might get written.
> 
> Kaytaryn DesMarais is an OC I created when I first started writing Dragon Age RP back in 2010. She occasionally pops up in my DA fanfics, but none of these worlds with her are necessarily connected, except for "We Do What Must Be Done," which is part of her canon past. All these years later, her canon history is still evolving.


End file.
